When Ego Loses and Jesus Wins

“He hath made every thing beautiful in his time.” — Ecclesiastes 3:11, KJV

“Are you stubborn?” I remember asking myself that question more than once. I had been introduced to a man who, many times, had refused to welcome people who came to his home to share the Good News. His answer was almost always the same: no. He had heard Bible studies before. He had been invited before. People had tried to reach him before. Yet, despite every attempt, his heart remained closed.

His name is Johndel, the father and head of the Delos Santos family. When I first visited their home, I knew I could not simply walk in, open a Bible, and expect him to listen. There had already been people before me who had tried. So instead of beginning with a lesson, I began with a question: “What do you believe in? And what is your understanding of faith?” He seemed surprised, as though he had not expected me to ask. He paused before answering.

Then he began to share what he had learned, what he had experienced, and why he firmly held on to the beliefs he had carried for years. As I listened, I realized that these were not merely ideas he had picked up along the way. They were convictions deeply rooted in his understanding of faith. And for me, that was already a small breakthrough. Not because he had changed his mind. But because he was willing to talk. There were moments when the differences between us felt difficult to bridge.

There were beliefs he held firmly, and truths I felt deeply convicted to share. It would have been easy to turn those moments into arguments. At one point, he asked a question that stayed with me: “If I already believe in God, why do I need to change what I believe?” For a moment, I had to think carefully about how I would respond. I did not want to make him feel that I was attacking everything he believed.

I simply answered, “Maybe the question is not whether you believe in God. Maybe the question is whether we are willing to let God show us more of who He is through His Word.” That conversation reminded me why I could not approach him simply as someone I needed to convince. He was not a blank page. He had convictions, experiences, questions, and years of understanding behind him. But I did not want to win an argument and lose a person. Instead of trying to defeat his reasoning, I tried to understand it. So I listened to his beliefs, his questions, and his understanding of faith, and even the things I did not immediately agree with.

“Let us not simply listen to what I say. Let us see what God’s Word says.” Those simple words became the beginning of a long and difficult journey. There were days when the conversations led to nowhere. There were questions that led to more questions. Sometimes we would finish a discussion, and I would leave wondering if anything had actually changed. I quietly asked God, “Lord, is this really going anywhere?” There were times when the thought crossed my mind: “Maybe he will never change.”

But every time discouragement came, prayer brought me back to the same truth: I was not responsible for changing Johndel’s heart. God was. So I kept coming back. Then, somewhere along the way, something began to change—not only in Johndel, but inside the home itself. His family began listening too. At first, I was simply trying to reach one man. But God was opening a door to an entire family. Their desire to understand became more evident. And I began to see something I could not have produced through my own effort. God was softening hearts.

Still I placed it in God's hand, that whatever decision they made would come from a genuine desire to follow Jesus—not from pressure, emotion, or anyone else's expectations. Then, the moment finally came. Johndel and his entire family decided to be baptized. And when I saw Johndel and his family take that step, I could not help but feel joy—not the kind of joy that comes from thinking, “We finally convinced him,” but the deeper joy of knowing that God had been working in hearts all along. In the end, I did not win an argument. Jesus won a heart.

Name: Gospel Ruiz/66th Batch

Mission Field: Basdacu Looh, Bohol